"I want chips and I want them right now" at 11 pm "now now now" another repeat "now now now" another and another till you will have to answer!
Wow I loved mathematics and now I have a problem to solve........God is great!
"This is really going to be fun" I muttered to myself, more of an assurance than anticipation of joy.
Before I decided what to say I actually foresaw the consequences of each of the options.
I was happy that there were no chips at home so the option of giving in to her plight was out of question. Her paratha and sabji (vegetable and bread) meant for dinner were still left. My aim was that she eats her dinner not chips or chocolate or namkeen (snacks) or any other junk!
I said that there were no chips at home but sabji paratha is available.
"no no now now "
"now now now"
"now now now"
Each "now" of hers was hammering the only brain I have.
At this point of time it was useless to describe her anything. She was hungry and annoyingly persistant.
I said " Fine (with forced expiration), lets go to the market and get chips"
All the yelling suddenly stopped!
"We will go in the car in our night suits" I said.
She completely agreed. We got down the stairs and I said "Theres no one here, its so dark and not even a single human is around" She said "ya.. sab so rahe hain na!(everyone is sleeping)"
"yes" I replied.
she went on "It's sleeping time Ma"
"I see"
"What about the shopkeeper" very subtly I brought him into picture
"arey Mamma, wo bhi to so raha hoga(Ooooooops Ma!!! he would also be sleeping)" saying this she stopped taking any further steps.
"Lets go back home Ma, his shop would also be closed"
"...mmmmm.."
" Papa bhi to subah hospital jate hain( Papa also goes to hospital in morning ), raat mei to sone ka time hota hai (night is sleeping time)"
We returned home!
"Are you hungry" I re-enquired. I was happy with my success!
She said "yes"
The next statement broke my happiness!
"namkeen khayenge Mamma (we will eat ready made snacks, Mamma)"
I took a deep breath and said "Today we will have it in new style Naisha"
"Which?"
"Namkeenoparatha style (namkeen + paratha)..........." she was getting curious!
I served her little plate with two big parathas sabji and a pinch of namkeen. With each morsal of sabji paratha I put one little speck of namkeen making a nose out of it on the face of sabji!
"This is yummier than chips Mamma"
"Really?"
Then she said what I love to hear.
"Thank you God for no chips, Thank you Ma for namkeenoparatha"
"Oh you're welcome darling"
As she slept away to glory I thanked God that the "now now now .." for chips would never happen at night again. I did nothing. I just let her do. She did, she learnt and she learnt that for ever!
Some responsibility, some creativity, lots of connectivity and a lesson for ever!
The art of peaceful non violent ways of parenting did not come spontaneously to me. Its a learned behaviour. I learnt it and so can you. Drop in your comments below. Specific questions can be asked via email.
email id: olivegreenparentingclinic@gmail.com
Wow I loved mathematics and now I have a problem to solve........God is great!
"This is really going to be fun" I muttered to myself, more of an assurance than anticipation of joy.
Before I decided what to say I actually foresaw the consequences of each of the options.
I was happy that there were no chips at home so the option of giving in to her plight was out of question. Her paratha and sabji (vegetable and bread) meant for dinner were still left. My aim was that she eats her dinner not chips or chocolate or namkeen (snacks) or any other junk!
I said that there were no chips at home but sabji paratha is available.
"no no now now "
"now now now"
"now now now"
Each "now" of hers was hammering the only brain I have.
At this point of time it was useless to describe her anything. She was hungry and annoyingly persistant.
I said " Fine (with forced expiration), lets go to the market and get chips"
All the yelling suddenly stopped!
"We will go in the car in our night suits" I said.
She completely agreed. We got down the stairs and I said "Theres no one here, its so dark and not even a single human is around" She said "ya.. sab so rahe hain na!(everyone is sleeping)"
"yes" I replied.
she went on "It's sleeping time Ma"
"I see"
"What about the shopkeeper" very subtly I brought him into picture
"arey Mamma, wo bhi to so raha hoga(Ooooooops Ma!!! he would also be sleeping)" saying this she stopped taking any further steps.
"Lets go back home Ma, his shop would also be closed"
"...mmmmm.."
" Papa bhi to subah hospital jate hain( Papa also goes to hospital in morning ), raat mei to sone ka time hota hai (night is sleeping time)"
We returned home!
"Are you hungry" I re-enquired. I was happy with my success!
She said "yes"
The next statement broke my happiness!
"namkeen khayenge Mamma (we will eat ready made snacks, Mamma)"
I took a deep breath and said "Today we will have it in new style Naisha"
"Which?"
"Namkeenoparatha style (namkeen + paratha)..........." she was getting curious!
I served her little plate with two big parathas sabji and a pinch of namkeen. With each morsal of sabji paratha I put one little speck of namkeen making a nose out of it on the face of sabji!
"This is yummier than chips Mamma"
"Really?"
Then she said what I love to hear.
"Thank you God for no chips, Thank you Ma for namkeenoparatha"
"Oh you're welcome darling"
As she slept away to glory I thanked God that the "now now now .." for chips would never happen at night again. I did nothing. I just let her do. She did, she learnt and she learnt that for ever!
Some responsibility, some creativity, lots of connectivity and a lesson for ever!
The art of peaceful non violent ways of parenting did not come spontaneously to me. Its a learned behaviour. I learnt it and so can you. Drop in your comments below. Specific questions can be asked via email.
email id: olivegreenparentingclinic@gmail.com
Wonderful„. I think most of us would have either refused her angrily or given namkeen but this way of tackling is really innovative and very effective.
ReplyDeleteReally Innovative idea.. I was thinking what you would do... Its wonderful.. How you do it each time??
ReplyDeleteDo such things each time.... The problem gets solved, lots of connection builds up, the whole process becomes all the more fun!! It might seem work initially, but when you get the knack of it.....life will be a lot more fun!!
ReplyDelete